photo courtesy of Brianna White
Children can be a delightful addition to your wedding party, but they can also present challenges. If you’re thinking about inviting kids to your wedding, here are some ways to make sure it will be a good experience for everyone.
Do I have to invite children?
The first question to ask yourself is whether you need to invite kids at all, and the short answer is “no.” It’s your wedding, and you can invite (or not invite) anyone you want. You can choose to invite all the kids, no kids, or only certain kids. It’s up to you.
While it’s perfectly acceptable to exclude kids from your festivities (especially if your wedding will be a formal affair, run long, or go late into the evening), the question isn’t always that simple. It’s possible that some parents will feel offended if they’re not allowed to bring their kids, especially if your event will be short and casual, and if it’s held during the day. To prevent hurt feelings, communication is key!
That brings us to our first tip:
1. Communicate Your Expectations
Once you’ve decided whether or not to invite kids, you’ll need to communicate your decision to your guests clearly and early so they can plan accordingly.
If children will be invited, let parents know what childcare or other accommodations you’ll be making for the kids (see tips below). On the other hand, if you’re not allowing their kids to come, politely let parents know why. A friendly phone call—preferably before their invitation arrives—can let you explain the situation and answer parents’ questions. Assure them that as much as you would love to see their kids, the limitations of your guest list meant that you couldn’t invite minors, or you had to set a certain age cut-off. Whatever your choice is, let them know that you value their presence and that your decision was nothing personal.
photo courtesy of Ashlee Brooke
2. Organize Childcare If Possible
One of the most helpful things you can do for your guests with young children is to provide childcare, at least during certain portions of the event. Childcare can be pricy, of course, and it might not fit in your budget, but if you can afford to give parents a break and let them enjoy celebrating your day with you, they will be eternally grateful.
photo courtesy of Nicki G Photography
3. Create a Kid-Friendly Zone
For most kids, sitting quietly for hours on a hard chair is not their idea of a celebration. You can make the experience more pleasant for everyone if you provide a space specifically designed with the children in mind.
A safe, inviting kid zone can be a great place for arts and crafts as well as a kids’ table when it’s time to eat. (A separate kids’ table can make dinner more enjoyable for kids and adults alike, but bear in mind that children under age 6 or 7 probably won’t be comfortable being separated from their parents for long.)
You can fill the Kid Zone with any number of fun activities like crayons, picture books, games, mask-making, or sidewalk chalks. One memorable activity is helping kids record their own marriage advise for the new couple. An age-appropriate movie is always an easy way to keep the wee ones entertained, but we’ve also seen cool weddings with face painting, balloon twisting, puppeteers, and scavenger hunts. A gift bag for each child can provide the supplies to keep themselves entertained as well as making each kid feel personally recognized and welcomed.
photo courtesy of Kayla Bertagnolli
4. Keep Kids Moving
Some kids will happily sit still for hours on end, but others will self-combust if they aren’t allowed to get up and move. You can give them plenty of opportunities to work out their wiggles with lawn games like a ring toss, bean bag corn hole, giant Jenga, an obstacle course or bouncy house, lawn bowling, frisbee, body bumpers, or toss-and-catch games.
If your schedule includes dancing (and if that part of the event doesn’t come after kids’ bedtime), it’s a great chance for children to take part in the fun. Having kids on the dance floor can help everyone loosen up and enjoy seeing the little ones at their cutest! You may even want to have your band include some specific tunes in their set that will get their little feet moving. But be careful: When it comes to dancing, kids have been known to steal the show.
photo courtesy of Kayla Betragnolli
5. Make Sure the Kids Are in the Photos
Wedding photos featuring kids can be some of the most precious and memorable, but they take some planning. Let your photographer and/or videographer know in advance if you’ll be inviting kids to your wedding.
photo courtesy of Pepper Nix
6. Give Kids Responsibilities
For some kids, the best way to keep them entertained and out of trouble is to give them a job matched to their abilities. Besides the traditional responsibilities like flower girls or ring bearers, kids who are old enough can help take coats, hand out programs or wedding favors, usher guests to their seats, or be in charge of the guest book. Some children may even be able to help keep younger ones entertained. Giving a disposable camera to a child to take candid photos can yield delightful results! A child’s favorite part of the day may be feeling like they have an important contribution to make.
photo courtesy of Pepper Nix
7. Provide a Kids’ Menu
No matter how excited you are about the delicious menu you’ve planned, the kids may be a lot happier with chicken nuggets, grilled cheese sandwiches, or PBJs. Why not give them what they want? It’s cheaper, less wasteful, and way more likely to keep kids happy.
photo courtesy of Logan Walker
8. Talk To Your Planner
Finally, if you’re thinking about inviting kids to your wedding, you should definitely discuss it with your planner. Besides helping you coordinate your kid-accommodations with your vendors and venue, a planner may have fabulous ideas for how to make sure your special day is one that everyone—including your smallest guests—will love.